Feels like me on a good day.

This is my last post. I love you. I have no one but you. I don’t have someone to talk to or vent my feelings. I can’t tell you directly what feeling cuz it never works out the way it should. Idk what to do about what I have planned now… So this is it. Do I give up or what? We’ll see I guess.

Well I guess its all reset back to start..only this time I didn’t do it.. at least I don’t think I did… which means I did.

By all means I’m getting mad but that don’t mean I don’t feel sorry for you.

How sad you’re going to be. I wish I could stick around to see your face when you realize you’ve permanently change and it’s all thanks to me, I was wrong for coming here .You’ll walk alone and run around your lonely home.
Look for my face but I’m already gone.

Idk wtf is wrong w me as of late but I just feel like I’m that guy no one wants around but is really useful. Like I’m not one to pay attention to but my skills are solid. I don’t feel respected. I’m feeling like im constantly undermined, like I’m not important yet I’m a valuable piece in your game. Then part of me feels like I’m being whiney cuz I feel such a way. Everything frustrates me now when I used to never be bothered by anything. Now I bother myself by feeling like I’m bothering everyone else. Tough.

OK. All I need for you to know is that after all this is done, I still love you.

I’m feeling like I’m being deceived, but I’m positive I’m not. There’s no reason for me to feel this way. It makes me angry at myself because it becomes a big deal in my mind but that’s it. Its not a big deal anywhere else. No one cares. Because its not real. That’s what I keep reminding myself but its not enough. I need your kiss, your touch. I don’t know what’s going on but I just don’t have a good feeling about it. Why I am the way I am, I don’t know. Wish I could stop me. But I can’t. Cuz I’m the problem. Always the problem. I came here because everywhere else I can go has eyes on me. Here I kinda just get lost in the crowd. It will take a while before this even meets your eyes. I love you and I trust you.